Let’s call our gospel reading, “Two Failures and a Success.” We’ll start with the success. That is, ironically, Jesus.
Throughout the gospel of John Jesus has been talking about his hour; or more that it is not his hour. But now his hour has come. Jesus has completed the last supper with the disciples and he’s gone to a garden to pray. The story unfolds as if Jesus is powerless and is unable to stop what is happening to him. But we the readers know that Jesus has predicted this. And that despite all appearances, Jesus is still actually in charge.
The scene of Jesus’ arrest is nighttime. Throughout the gospel we have been hearing about a contrast between light and darkness. Jesus has said that he is the light of the world. But we’ve also heard that people preferred darkness. We met Nickodemus, a leading Pharisee and religious expert, who has come to Jesus at night. And we’ve met an unnamed Samaritan woman who Jesus meets by a well in the middle of the day.
Now as Jesus, the light of the world, is praying in darkness we are told that Judas leads a cohort of Roman soldiers and some police from the chief priests and Pharisees to find him. We’re told that this cohort of soldiers and the police are carrying lanterns and torches. It’s a subtly twisted thing to have to arrest the light of the world in the darkness, and having to bring your own source of light to see!
Now don’t read things into this text that aren’t there. The other three gospels say Judas identifies Jesus with a kiss; a gesture of friendship. But that part is not here. Instead, Jesus takes the initiative and says, “Whom are you looking for?” They reply, “Jesus of Nazareth.” To which Jesus responds, “I am he.”
What should happen next? The next thing that should happen is that these soldiers and police seize Jesus and take him into custody. Instead, John tells us they stepped back and fell to the ground.
When Jesus says, “I am he,” it is better translated as “I AM,” the name of God from the Old Testament. The situation is almost laughable even though it’s not intended to be funny. Picture it: We’re told that Judas came with a Roman cohort and police from the religious leaders. A Roman cohort is 600 armed men. Romans do not believe Jewish faith. They are not about to step back and immediately fall to the ground at the words, I AM.
Biblical scholars say we are not to take these words literally but instead realize John is writing in the style of a heroic tale. Here we have unarmed Jesus at night in a garden and at two simple words from him hundreds and hundreds of foreign and domestic soldiers who are there to arrest him step back and fall to the ground!
Who’s in charge here? It’s certainly not the soldiers! All is going according to Jesus’ intentions.
The scene swings to Peter, who is one of the two failure stories here, but eventually we return to Jesus who is by then being questioned by Annas, the father-in-law of the high priest. Jesus is not exactly defiant in his answers but he challenges Annas in return. He says, “If I have spoken wrongly testify to the wrong. But if I have spoken rightly, why do you strike me?”
Jesus is the ironic success story here because he does not back down in the face of wrongful arrest and abuse. He is in charge of every moment and his opponents unwittingly do exactly God’s work even as they destroy Jesus. Jesus is the example we want to follow in our own lives. We do not face persecution in our society today but we do want to live in a way that witnesses to our faith in God even as our society thinks it foolish.
Quite likely though, we will not be as faithful as Jesus. So let’s turn to the two failures. The first one is Judas. Judas is the example of someone who has utterly forsaken what God is doing. Judas has been given an insider account of who Jesus is and who Jesus reveals God to be. He has been with Jesus all along. He has heard the teachings. He has seen the miracles. Judas was at the last supper. Just hours before he had his feet washed by Jesus. Despite all that he walks away and even betrays Jesus.
I doubt we realized this, but there are details “missing” about Judas in John’s gospel. Now is the time to point that out. In the other gospels we are told that Judas sells Jesus out for 30 pieces of silver; the value of an injured slave. It’s a paltry amount and it’s pathetic. But there is no such detail in John’s gospel. In the other gospels we may think Judas pathetic, but we can at least understand him being motivated by greed. There is no such understanding here. John’s gospel does not tell us why Judas betrays Jesus. If we stick to just what John tells us we realize there are no ulterior motives for Judas. As commentator Gail O’Day notes, Judas’ actions are simply evil. There is no logic or justification for them. Earlier in the gospel we were told, “And this is the judgment, that the light has come into the world, and people loved darkness rather than light because their deeds were evil.”
What does evil look like? Judas. Judas, treated with love and humility by Jesus, simply walks away and then betrays him.
Believing in “evil” is passe these days. But John’s gospel simply accepts that there are destructive dynamics at work in the world that defy all reason. People just don’t want God’s love. Period.
Hopefully we cannot relate to Judas. But we most likely can relate to the other failure story – Peter.
Peter has been bungling everything plus putting his foot in his mouth. We see that continue here. In the children’s sermon we talked about the way Peter cutting off the right ear of the high priest’s slave was an act of cowardice. He almost certainly had to have struck from behind. And even at that, what a feeble hit it was. Not that I would want to have my ear cut off at all, but Peter doesn’t even manage to get in one single deadly blow!
But his failures of courage for the night are only just beginning. He follows Jesus along with another of the disciples who is unnamed. The unnamed disciple goes with Jesus into the courtyard of the high priest. That disciple is potentially in trouble depending on how things go for Jesus. But where is Peter? He’s standing outside the courtyard at the gate. He’s basically in the street looking in. The other disciple ten invites Peter in.
I find it interesting that there is a woman who is guarding this gate. A woman as a gatekeeper is certainly not usual for those days! But I have found nothing in commentaries about it. What is clear though, is that she is the first to question Peter about his discipleship to Jesus. This is not some big burly guard from the Roman cohort. And this is not some powerful police officer from the religious leaders. This is an unarmed and powerless person. Remember, in those days women’s testimony wasn’t considered worth much in a court of law. This person could do Peter no harm. Yet even at this Peter denies being a follower of Jesus.
The scene shifts to Jesus being questioned and then back again to Peter. We the readers are to understand Jesus’ questioning happening at the same time as Peter’s questioning. But while Jesus remains 100% faithful, Peter is failing at a rate of 100%. In the courtyard when questioned by the slaves and police Peter denies Jesus again. And then the third denial comes when he is asked by a slave again.
This text is a success story and two failure stories. I suspect the story we most strongly relate to is Peter’s. I believe that is the author’s intention. He knows we fall short of Jesus. He also knows that if we were as evil as Judas we wouldn’t be reading this gospel in the first place! So that leaves us to be like Peter.
Despite his failings Peter is eventually restored. Unlike Judas, Peter stays with Jesus. Peter fails. He fails miserably and shamefully. But he does not walk away into the darkness.
It is the act of staying that redeems Peter. I think that is how God’s grace works. It is great if we never fail and never lose courage. But we know that we do. We fail. We get angry. We act out of fears, greed, and ignorance. We hurt ourselves. We hurt others. We hurt God’s creation. But as long as we keep returning to God we are returning to our source of salvation. We are returning to the light.
That is imperfect discipleship. But that is authentic discipleship. It is where we find our faith authentically growing and abilities becoming stronger.
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